A Conversation with myself – June 2020 – 91 Days on – How do we move forward ?
Jun 11th, 2020 by Chris

Questioning Chris (QC): What did you do in the old days ?
Answering Chris (AC) : I used to help people have difficult conversations, or at least conversations that they thought might be difficult.
QC: What do you mean ‘difficult’ ?
AC: Well, some of them felt difficult, because they had the potential to leave people in positions of authority exposed or vulnerable to attack (i.e. how comes they hadn’t dealt with this thing better before ?….)
And some might feel difficult because they really needed to involve people who hadn’t been involved before (and that might feel a bit scary, difficult to do or embarrassing – who knows what they might say !)
And some were difficult because they just were. Complex, wicked, wading through treacle, herding cats – that kind of thing ….
QC: So, what happened ?
AC: This virus thing, and having to do things online, meant things felt more difficult again:
- difficult for everyone to be heard and understood and to feel it
- difficult to include everyone (digital divide etc)
- difficult to run some of the processes that we had come to rely on
QC: I’m bored with you telling me what’s difficult, what’s easy ?
AC: Well, it’s easy to put off difficult conversations……And, it’s easy to gather with people like us, who pretty much agree with us and to forget about other voices…… And, it’s easy to give up and give in……
QC: Bored again. Stop doing lists of three things and tell me about what’s really important !
AC: If we are serious about inclusive communities and serious about sustainability, then we’ve got to find creative ways to face difficult realities, ways to make sure everyone is heard and understood, to have places where ideas can be tested and trust and relationships grown.
QC: Dangerously like another list of three, but I’ll let that go. How do we do that ?
AC: Online – We are learning. We are getting better at establishing cultures of safety and authenticity. We are surprising ourselves at what is actually possible. Some of us are having amazing experiences talking with people from all over the world and sharing and learning together, forming focused communities of practice etc.
Offline – We are going to have to be creative here too. Get togethers are going to be physically distanced for a while yet. But, let’s imagine what could be possible……
- consultation about town centres done in the town centre itself – maybe a town consultation trail around a series of ‘exhibits’ with questions and interactions in each place – maybe different exhibits designed by different groups of people, maybe ….
- walking consultations – small groups of people who would never normally spend time together going for walks together and feeding back what becomes clearer
Hybrid approaches – e.g. inviting small groups to make films that help set up targeted discussions etc etc
QC – So what will make the difference now ?
AC: It’s up to us. It is genuinely difficult crisis for many people, but also, as many people have remarked it is a crisis with opportunities.
Will enough of us be able to give enough attention to the difficult questions that lie beyond keeping the show on the road ?
Are we actually committed to including and growing relationships with people who have tended to not be included well in the past ?
Are we willing to take risks and try stuff, when we don’t completely know what we are doing ?
QC: That’s three questions you have asked. I thought that was my role. I’m not sure this talking to yourself thing is healthy anymore – maybe its time to get out more and hear what other people are thinking ?